Monday, February 27, 2006

Tag Story

Here is the story I was supposed to post a while ago but never got down to it. I have obviously exceeded the word limit and I hope I have stuck to at least Rule No.2 and not repeated the words. And to boot it is quite a strange story. Hopefully it will make sense to at least a few people. Read at your own risk! :D

The rules were:

(1) Write a 100-to-200-word entry using the following words:

I, me, blowjob, grapes, random, power, loneliness, water, robot and blue;

(2) Use these words once and only once; and of course

(3) The entry should make sense.

She looked around at her surroundings, still unable to believe that she had made it to the city of Robot. Watching all the machines acting and doing things like normal flesh and blood human beings had caused her much alarm the first time she saw them. She never thought that it would be possible, at least not in her lifetime.

The way they looked was creepy enough, but they also seemed to possess human emotions. This was what had disturbed her the most. But now she was quite used to their presence. She had found out that the only thing that separated them from their human counterparts was their slightly high, metallic voices and the strange manner in which they spoke.

She walked along the city in a random, haphazard manner, lost in her thoughts when she suddenly found herself in a green gazebo across which was a pond, the surface of which was absolutely still and reflected the blue sky and fluffy clouds perfectly. She gazed at the beautiful scene in front of her totally awestruck, and wondered how come she had never been to this place before. A wave of loneliness suddenly washed over her, knocking out her breath with its intensity. She sighed, knowing that she could never go back to the place where her kind resided, Lande.

Suddenly she heard a rustling sound and looked up. On the opposite side of the pond stood a man, “or was he ‘one of those’”? she wondered. He walked slowly towards her and asked her, “Alright there?” His voice was deep and smooth. “A man!” she thought, and her heart leaped. “Oh! I’m OK. Was just thinking about my home and feeling a bit sad …” she trailed off. “But, tell me! How did you get here? The only other Humans that were here went in to battle a week ago. You did not wish to go?”

He looked at her with an amused smile. “Me not Human, miss.” She looked at him with surprise, “But your voice…”

“Aye. Latest technology, miss. Make sound more human-like.” He gave her a broad grin, as if he had accomplished it himself.

After a pause he asked, “Your home you miss. Why not you go then?” She sighed once more and murmured, “It’s a long story.”

“Eldor having lots time, miss.”


“That being my nomenclature, miss. You telling story now?”

“Well then, here’s the short version. Stole grapes from neighbour’s vineyard, got caught, was banished.”

“Crime suits the punishment not, Eldor thinks.”

“Grapes equal power in Lande. And that is the most important thing. Without it you are nothing. Wasn’t thinking right when stole the goddamn fruit!”

“Well, cheer up! Eldor know what help you be happy yet again. Do you know blowjob how to?” saying so he reached down into his pants.

She was stunned for a second then yelled, “WHAT???!! How dare you?? I cannot believe this! Get out of here before I ping for the guard. One must be around here somewhere”

Eldor looked at her in mild astonishment, reached into his pocket and removed a small pipe-like instrument. He held it out to her to see.

“What’s that?” she asked suspiciously.

“It a water bubbler be. You pour in,” saying so he scooped up some from the pond and poured it in, “blow from this end then…” He then blew softly into it and a melody poured out of it, like a gushing river. She just stared at it and at Eldor. He slowly began moving towards the pond and she followed him, mesmerized by the strange yet soothing sounds made by the bubbler. Soon he was ankle deep and she followed him in. After a while he stopped playing and she snapped out of the reverie she had fallen into and gasped when she realized that the cool liquid came up to almost her shoulders. She started panicking and clung onto him for support. Eldor smiled down at her then pushed her head underneath. She struggled to breathe but he was much stronger than her. Soon she struggled no more. Eldor let her go and walked back to the bank. He looked back one more time, smiled sadly and dialed a Lande number with his head. After it went through his said two words, “Job accomplished” and disconnected it.


PuNeEt said...

hey cool u took the tag
lemme read it...

bt ur story has 723words....
hmmmm thats cheating ;-) lolz

chalta hain...


PuNeEt said...

that was a high tech story...

nice imagination :-))

water bubbler funda was so funny :-) hahahaha

keep rocking


eLdor said...


u writing mind blowing story miss! done well.


s0ulasylum said...

hey that was a fun post.. 'blowjob'?? wondering how I would use that word ..jeez !!.. nicely done tho;)
also.."His voice was deep and smooth".. he he.. M&B fan aren't we? :)

DalzRulz said...

hi, well I must say u r not without talent, nice use of words...btw, what is this TAG story bit?

the Monk said...

good one there...good idea to use science fiction....breath of fresh air, I guess...

rebel_on_loose said...

A piece of erudition.

niki yokota said...

woow~ i think u can make a real fantasy novel for a living!!
it doesnt seem like a tag..(*o*)
great job, phoenix-chan!!
but wat is this blowjob and grapes thingy lollll
very difficult tag na!
pls take a rest and have a happy weekend!!

Phoenix Rises said...

Hey Puneet!
Thanks a lot!
I know that I crossed the word limit, but what to do? I simply got carried away! :D

Hey Eldor!
Welcome to my blog! What a coincidence!!!! LOL!!
Thanks for the compliment!

Hi Soul!
I didn't tag anyone, but please go ahead and make up a story yourself. I sure would like to read it.
M&B fan?? No way! We both know "who" the fan really is, or was rather! :))

Hi Dalz!
You know, at first read "I must say u r without talent" and was mad for a bit and then I read "nice use of words"!! Hehe!
There was this tag going around in the blogosphere. I'd read on Cheesy and Puneet's blogs, so decided to try it out myself. Why don't you also give it a go?

Hi Monk!
Thanks! This was my first attempt at the genre. Though I think that if I'd been given the liberty to use as many words as I wished I'd have fleshed out the characters better.

Hi Rebel!
I had to check the dictionary to find out what "erudition" read!! Thanks a lot, but I'm not being modest or anything [I'm basically not a very modest person! ;)] but "piece of erudition" is too high a praise for this strange bit of fiction that I've cooked up! :D

Hi Ms. Bakshi!
Thanks to you too!
Hehe! I had to use those words somehow, so I just used them whichever way my story led me! :D
Have a happy weekend yourself! :)

DalzRulz said...

I'd love to give it a shot (tag story), could you please send me the link? You could leave it here or at my blog. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

hey affy!!
what a kooky story!! and clever use of the 'blowjob' word too., coz otherwise it might come under asaaataianasalaiapapaearas category!!! also iam guessin u were influenced by 'elder' book!!

Phoenix Rises said...

Hi Dalz!
You just make use of the 10 words that I have listed before starting the story. Read the rules again. Or did you want Puneet and Cheesy's links?

Hi Athy!
Kooky story huh? I'll just take that as a compliment!
What the hell does asaaataianasalaiapapaearas mean??????
Hehe! And yes, I did get inspired by "Eldest"!! :D

Phoenix Rises said...

Hey Athy!
With your help I figured out your "code". And am I glad that you hadn't actually spelt that out!!!!!! :))

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

Idiot Eldor!

Good Story ... seriously ... sheesh i had written such a pathetic one! loll

very unique types ... how long u been thinkin abt it eh??

and ... u write very well!!!

s0ulasylum said...

i just chewed up half of the small finger on my right hand thinking of writing a story ... he he.. and did I read this right?.. "was" a M&B fan.. aww cmon u telling me she's given up already??? :)

PuNeEt said...

are u putting a new post
or should i tag u again for some other story ;-)


niki yokota said...

aww~ no march post kya??

Phoenix Rises said...

Hey Cheesy!
Thanks a lot! I didn't think much at all. I was just staring all the words and then I stared at "Robot" a lot, and began making it up as I went along.

Hey Soul!
You's be surprised to know, that our dear friend has grown up at last, and reads M & Bs rarely now!!

Hey Puneet, Niki!
Hehe!! For a change I did have ideas for new posts but felt very lazy to type 'em out!! And another tag wouldn't be such a bad idea!!
There! A new post!

Nomadic said...

hey phoenix,
Great story!
cool & funny...

Phoenix Rises said...

Hey Nomadic!
Thanks a lot!! Glad you liked it. :D

Anonymous said...

Must say u have a creative imagination :)) Nice piece of art !
Murdered by a robot :))
But, you've used the words "I" and "me" more than once